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In late January a certain someone and I were in
a lovely town with a pleasant atmosphere and charming shops. One of the
shops had pink and red hearts stuck to the window. A woman on the street
commented with a shudder that the store was already promoting Valentines Day. A
certain someone jumped right in with a snort, "Yeah. The Hallmark
holiday."
Since I am the sweetie of the certain someone with the cynical attitude, my feathers were a little ruffled. The more I thought about it, the more ruffled they got. I remembered last year when it seemed all the women close to me were with men who felt put upon and aggrieved by this dangerous day. It was so threatening to them and they were anxious about screwing it up.
We know men love the chase. It's their biological imperative. They are so good at wooing a woman. When that woman is wooed and wowed with sufficient energy the deal is usually sealed. I love the image of the caveman dragging a woman back to his lair, by the hair. Once she's firmly installed by the hearth many men can get a little lazy. Or maybe a lot lazy. To put it in the kindest terms, once he's bagged her, he's on to focusing on other things.
Not so fast, mister. Like I always say, I'm low maintenance- not no maintenance. Women like hearts and flowers. Especially Stargazer Lilies and Tulips. Actually, we love them. Women like gestures on an ongoing basis. Sometimes guys aren't so great with that. Okay, we probably forgive the lack of gifts or flowers, but don't also trash our day!
It's like Mother's Day for relationships. On Mother's Day we appreciate the special person who gives every day all year. The same is true for Valentine's Day. I'm sure there are some guys who don't slow down on the sweet gestures as the years go by, but I personally have never been married to one.
Men are so stressed about getting it right they decide it's a stupid occasion. Guys, this could not be simpler. You know those little gestures you should be doing once in a while? Do them now! Flowers, chocolate or a card. Even a panty bouquet from Victoria Secret. Stop grumping about it and be thankful for all the reminders! They're impossible to ignore.
I've decided to do my own boycott of romantic Valentine's Day this year. I'm going to celebrate with people who really care about this special day- massage therapists and manicurists. No. Not really. I'm going to celebrate with kindergartners. This day is their high holiday and the more hearts and flowers and sweets and treats the better. I heart twenty-three five and six year olds and they heart me back.
Since I am the sweetie of the certain someone with the cynical attitude, my feathers were a little ruffled. The more I thought about it, the more ruffled they got. I remembered last year when it seemed all the women close to me were with men who felt put upon and aggrieved by this dangerous day. It was so threatening to them and they were anxious about screwing it up.
We know men love the chase. It's their biological imperative. They are so good at wooing a woman. When that woman is wooed and wowed with sufficient energy the deal is usually sealed. I love the image of the caveman dragging a woman back to his lair, by the hair. Once she's firmly installed by the hearth many men can get a little lazy. Or maybe a lot lazy. To put it in the kindest terms, once he's bagged her, he's on to focusing on other things.
Not so fast, mister. Like I always say, I'm low maintenance- not no maintenance. Women like hearts and flowers. Especially Stargazer Lilies and Tulips. Actually, we love them. Women like gestures on an ongoing basis. Sometimes guys aren't so great with that. Okay, we probably forgive the lack of gifts or flowers, but don't also trash our day!
It's like Mother's Day for relationships. On Mother's Day we appreciate the special person who gives every day all year. The same is true for Valentine's Day. I'm sure there are some guys who don't slow down on the sweet gestures as the years go by, but I personally have never been married to one.
Men are so stressed about getting it right they decide it's a stupid occasion. Guys, this could not be simpler. You know those little gestures you should be doing once in a while? Do them now! Flowers, chocolate or a card. Even a panty bouquet from Victoria Secret. Stop grumping about it and be thankful for all the reminders! They're impossible to ignore.
I've decided to do my own boycott of romantic Valentine's Day this year. I'm going to celebrate with people who really care about this special day- massage therapists and manicurists. No. Not really. I'm going to celebrate with kindergartners. This day is their high holiday and the more hearts and flowers and sweets and treats the better. I heart twenty-three five and six year olds and they heart me back.
"Hearts and Flowers" card by Jessica Vaughan, Bonny Doon, CA.
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